The Socially Awkward Penguin

I’m what is known as – in modern terms – a socially awkward penguin.  I’m pretty sure I was a socially awkward penguin before the term socially awkward penguin even existed but it’s nice to have a name for it.  This way when a socially awkward penguin moment occurs, I can label it as such.  And Mystical Roo, who is trying to discourage this behaviour, can whisper at me “socially awkward penguin.”

I had a socially awkward penguin moment (one of many) the other day when I went to get my boots reheeled.  We popped into a little cobbler and Mystical Roo encouraged me to step up to the counter.  I struggle with things like this because I don’t know what the etiquette is.  I don’t know the format.  Do you just hand over your boots?  Do you ask them if they do boots?  Do you pay in advance or when you collect the boots?  So many questions!  Over-thinking is not a socially awkward penguin’s friend.

So I just kind of held my boots, like some kind of offering and asked if they could be reheeled.  The woman behind the counter said yes that would be fine, wrote down my name, took my boots and gave me a little piece of paper with a number on it.  That was all.  And I needed more because I didn’t know what to do next.  I mumbled something about asking when to pay and she said to just pay on collection.  When would they be ready?  Tuesday.  This caught me off guard because it was a Saturday and cold and I wasn’t sure how I would do without my boots until then.  And when do you open?  8am until 5pm.  Which is totally inconvenient for me because I have to go to work.

But I just smile and nod and say thank you and walk away.  Mystical Roo calls me out on having another socially awkward penguin moment.  Little Stalky, why did you leave your boots with that lady when you know that you can’t pick them up on Tuesday?  Little Stalky, why didn’t you just ask for the boots back and take them elsewhere?  Why?  Because she’d already given me a little purple ticket.  And she already had my boots.  What else is there to do but smile and nod, say thank you and walk away.  That gets you out of the immediate situation and then you can think of a solution later.  One that possibly involves bribing your boyfriend into collecting your boots for you.

It’s a hard life being a socially awkward penguin.