Whale Season

It's whale season again here and the whales are officially on the move.  I'm not really sure where they're going or even where they're coming from but I know that for the next few months the whales will be travelling through our waters.  Now I say it's whale season but I've yet to actually see one.  Everyone else seems to have seen one but I'm obviously in the wrong place at the wrong time.  To be fair, the view from my balcony shows the bay and really a whale shouldn't be in there.  If a whale was in there - like last year - it normally means it's poorly and not doing so good.  Duke has seen loads of whales from her house and today Monster Noggin said she saw like four whales.  Four whales!  Apparently there was much tail splashing action.  I'm missing out.  I can see that I'm going to have to go in search of whale activity.  Maybe when Mystical Roo gets home we can do the coastal walk or something.  I spotted whales the last time we did that.  And looked like a total tourist when I started hopping about, pointing and announcing to anyone who would listen that I had spotted a whale.  Not this year though.  I seem to be the only one who hasn't spotted a whale.  I'll have to go out and about and see if I can get me a photo.  I'm hoping to get a whale hanging out with dolphins.  That would be cool.

Little Stalky Gets Things Stuck in the Car Door

In another walking-home-from-work adventure, I yesterday got rescued from the rain by a colleague who was out and about in her car.  This happens on a fairly regular basis and I've received lifts from a number of different people when travelling both to and from work.  I would like to state that I have never accepted a lift from a stranger.  Yesterday was a bit of a miserable day and though not really cold it was dark and drizzly.  I was actually offered a lift home on the back of a motorbike - with helmet and everything - but I could picture Bear Z in my mind going no, don't do it.  Don't you dare get on the back of that bike.  So I didn't.  I'd gotten about halfway home, listening to Dr Kermode on my i-pod, when I heard a toot.  Or the car variety.  You have to be wary when approaching tooters as although often it is a work colleague stopping to offer a lift, it can sometimes be a random man who thinks tooting is appropriate.  Never approach the random man.  Just frown upon them until they go away.  In this case it was in fact a colleague who came to rescue me from the drizzle.  Now it's always a bit of a kerfuffle getting into a vehicle when you're kitted out in walking gear.  Especially when you add a brolly into the mix.  I have to unclip my rucksack and remove it from my shoulders, pull out my head phones - so as not to be impolite - stow the i-pod in my pocket and put the brolly under my arm.  Not as easy as it sounds.  Especially when you're as clumsy as I am.  I tend to rush myself too and do things too quickly.  Yesterday I managed two things.  One:  I trapped one headphone from the i-pod  in the door of the car.  Two:  I trapped a handful of hair in the door of the car. Fantastic.  And you'd think I'd just quickly open and shut the door and fix this situation but I didn't actually realise the situation until the situation was underway and the car was in motion.  I realised my error when I went to tuck away the i-pod but the headphone refused to budge.  I realised my second error when I tried to turn my head and felt a tug at my hair.  I cringed.  A bit of hair and a bit of headphone were hanging out the passenger side door.  Bouncing along in the wind.  Enjoying a fair smattering of rain.  Probably looking stupid.  And I guess a sensible person would have mentioned this.  Asked the driver if they wouldn't mind stopping so that the situation could be attended to.  But I just felt really stupid.  And I decided that I would feel even stupider if I actually had to admit my stupidity.  Which is stupid in itself because it was less stupidity and more clumsiness that caused the stupid situation.  Instead I decided to hold my ground.  We were less than a minute from home so I could hold out.  I just hoped that my colleague hadn't noticed the bit of hair or the bit of headphone that was stuck in the door.  I had to keep very still and prepare myself for the bends.  Move with the car, not away from it.  Otherwise things were likely to get painful.  I'm sure I didn't look that stupid.  I should have made mention of my neck, which is actually much better now but would have made for a great excuse with regards to sitting very still.  When the car pulled up outside my house I opened the door at lighting speed just to try and disguise my error.  I hope I didn't look rude or like I was trying to escape.  I said thank you, gathered my things and then scurried away to the safety of the flat.  I don't think too much damage has been done.  The headphone was intact.  My hair was intact.  It's just my dignity that's taken a bit of a bashing.  But what's new.  

Facebook Addict

I remember being a bit slow on the Facebook front and taking a while to actually start up a page.  I used it a bit in England but would normally only check it once a day.  However now that I live in Australia I can confirm that I'm an official addict.  My name is Little Stalky and I have a problem.  I'm addicted to Facebook.  But I'm not the only one.  I got thinking about this because Monster Noggin confessed that she too is a Facebook addict.  And I'm sure there's plenty more out there.  I see there are two mitigating factors.  One:  I moved to Australia.  Two:  I now have access to Facebook via my phone.  I think that Facebook might seem a bit pointless to some people but I now find it a really useful tool for keeping in touch with people who live half way round the world from me.  I can see photos and find out what people are up to.  I can stay in contact with just a few words here and there.  It's a quick and easy way that allows me to feel somewhat more connected with the rest of the world.  That, I think, is a good thing.  Having Facebook on my phone is pretty much a bad thing.  Because I can't stop checking it.  I check Facebook on my phone a ridiculous number of times in the day.  Sometimes I think I do it without even thinking.  It's the first thing I do in the morning and the last thing I do before I go to sleep at night.  If I've got a spare five minutes I'll quickly check my Facebook.  If the adverts come on - and there are a lot of adverts in this country - then I'll check my Facebook.  If I'm waiting for a lift then I'll check my Facebook.  When I go to lunch, have a tea break, finish work...I'll check my Facebook.  When I've just finished on my computer, where I've just been on my Facebook, I'll shut down my computer and then...CHECK MY FACEBOOK!  It's utter madness.  I'm checking it every five minutes.  And what for?  What for?  The most stupid thing is that the majority of people I'm friends with on Facebook live in England.  And they're asleep.  So they're not updating Facebook.  So I'm checking Facebook just to learn that nothing has changed.  Because everyone is asleep.  Sometimes I actually stop and tell myself I'm being stupid.  Other times I just go ahead and do it without even realising I'm doing it.  It's habit.  And I don't know why I have this need.  Am I scared I'll miss out on some important news?  Could something wonderful have happened in the five minutes since I last checked?  I got scolded by Mystical Roo the other day for checking my Facebook during a film.  What the hell?  I wasn't even thinking.  I just did it.  And it's all because it's on my phone.  If it wasn't on my phone then I wouldn't be on it half as much.  And I know what you're thinking.  Little Stalky, remove that app.  But I can't.  Because I like it. I like being in Sydney and being able to post a picture then and there for friends and family to see.  When they wake up.  But still.  There's something nice about being able to just post an update whilst you're in the moment.  I think I just need to curb the constant checking.  Maybe hide my phone.  Or attach a post it note with a reminder that nothing new is likely to have happened in the last five minutes.  And on that note...I'm off to check my emails.  

Little Stalky Milks the Resin

Yesterday I went into work with Mystical Roo to help prepare a couple of orders.  This involved much weighing of resin which, in my mind, is very much like the milking of a cow.  Not that I've ever milked a cow, but this is what I imagine it might be like.  If a cow had taps.  Ok, I guess it's nothing like milking a cow but it still reminds me of the milking of a cow.  But cows aside, the weighing of resin involves Mystical Roo giving me a weight and Little Stalky drawing out resin until the scales indicate I have hit the correct weight.  It's fairly straight forward but a hundred buckets later the palms of my hands were really starting to hurt.  I think this is partly from the constant turning of the tap and partly because my weak girl like hands can't get the lids on the buckets properly.  That is a tough job.  I had to leave that to Mystical Roo because it got to the point where my hands were feeling bruised.  He's got proper man hands so he was ok.  As well as sore hands I now have a sore butt.  And you might wonder what on earth this has to do with the weighing of resin.  It's less to do with the actual weighing of resin and more to do with sitting on a tiny plastic bucket because you're too lazy to go and find a bigger bucket.  I spent most of the day weighing resin and labelling buckets and it absolutely knackered me.  I got home, cooked up a chili and then went into zombie mode.  What a wuss!  And I wasn't even doing that much physical work.  Mystical Roo and Ammy - yes Ammy - do this all week.  They're hardcore.

A Trolley Dude Sighting

In an important development in the whole Trolley Dude saga, I have received intel from Monster Noggin that Trolley Dude has officially been sighted.  Monster Noggin has sighted Trolley Dude.  Seen him in action. Confirmed that Trolley Dude is indeed alive and well.  But the shocker?  Well, according to Monster Noggin, Trolley Dude has gone and shaved his head!  I know.  Shocking.  One can only begin the ponder the possibilities of what this actually means.  Trolley Dude once had long and lustrous locks that were longer than my own.  He wore his dark black hair in a ponytail.  We marvelled at it.  Then, Trolley Dude shocked us all by cutting his hair into a more common and mundane style.  Was he trying to blend in?  We noticed his absence amongst the trolleys and wondered if his hair was behind his Trolley Dude like powers.  When Trolley Dude hadn't been spotted in weeks and other, less qualified, less hairy, less dude like dudes took over the trolley monitoring responsibilities at Woolworths, we wondered whether Trolley Dude had moved on to pastures new.  But it turns out that this is not the case.  He was just shaving his head.  And now he's back.  Sans hair but back in action.  But what is the story behind the shaved head?  What does it all mean?  Is the shaved head really the reason behind this lengthy absence?  Did he have a short stint in the army?  Or maybe in prison?  Did he have lice?  Did he have a hair dye malfunction?  Perhaps he's just being practical and going for a maintenance free look.  Or maybe he's just sick of the stigma associated with his hair.  Hell, Trolley Dude is probably making the point that his hair is not behind his power.  He's all powerful without any hair at all.  He's making the ultimate statement of Trolley Dude power.  Impressive.  It got my attention.  Though in truth I've yet to see Trolley Dude back in action.  All of this is based on the reports from Monster Noggin.  And as trustworthy as Monster Noggin is, if she wasn't wearing her glasses then we can't be sure of anything.  If Monster Noggin wasn't wearing her glasses then the Trolley Dude sighting may well have been an ugly naked mole rat.  Or a cactus.  Or a land dwelling shark.  Or just a random shopper pushing his or her trolley.  But I like to think that Monster Noggin was wearing her glasses.  Or was at least close enough that glasses were not necessary to ascertain the identity of Trolley Dude.  I may not have seen him whilst out shopping last night and I may not have seen him whilst getting milk the night before that but something tells me that Trolley Dude is making a comeback.  And he'll be bigger, badder and better than ever. 

Little Stalky & Monster Noggin Have a McDonalds Adventure

On Saturday, me, Monster Noggin and some of the gang went to Sydney to participate as audience members for the Australian X Factor.  Now I know you'll want to hear all about that but I think the McDonalds adventure has got to come first.  And with both stories demanding equal amounts of attention I felt it only right that the McDonalds tale get a post all to itself.  More on the X Factor tomorrow.  For now, I shall regale you with the tales of Little Stalky, Monster Noggin and the quest for the cheeseburger (dramatic music, ominous goat, roll credits).  At 11.30 that morning we were ridiculously hungry and knew that we were going to be sitting around for quite some time.  Listening to people sing and what not.  We needed feeding.  And what's more we needed feeding quickly.  Of course McDonalds was the obvious option.  It's cheap, it's convenient and you know what you're going to get.  Lets face it people, McDonalds was going to get the job done.  And we were in Sydney so of course there was going to be a McDonalds close by.  Monster Noggin consulted her phone which advised us that there was a McDonalds a mere few hundred metres away.  Excellent.  We were confident that we could navigate amongst the city dwellers and find ourselves some cheeseburger action.  Yeah!  We'd blend in.  We were - and continue to be - chic, confident and utterly at ease amongst the city folk.  No one need ever know that I have wellingtons that may or may not have walked through cow pats.  So we were nattering away, dodging cars and pedestrians alike, frowning upon weird starey men in cars and thoroughly looking forward to a cheeseburger shaped reward.  When we found the McDonalds we figured we'd already walked off some of the calories that a cheeseburger would inevitably force upon us.  It was a very posh McDonalds.  Possibly the poshest McDonalds in the world.  Ever.  It was like walking into a theatre with the elaborate ceiling thing going on.  It felt regal.  This was the city style McDonalds.  Not a cow in sight.  Not in the traditional sense anyway.  So we strode through that posh McDonalds, we ordered our food and we scoffed like mad.  Partly because we were very hungry and partly because we were conscious of not missing any of the auditions.  Hurrying back with chips and drinks in hand we decided that we were definitely very clever.  Navigating around Sydney.  Blending in.  Locating the McDonalds and then finding our way back to the entertainment centre.  All by ourselves.  I was proud of us.  I was so proud that I was actually congratulating Monster Noggin and myself as we approached the entertainment centre.  Well done us for finding the McDonalds and getting back in time for the auditions.  Well done us for navigating the streets of Sydney.  Well done us for finding that McDonalds which was really only a mere few hundred meters away from us.  If only we'd glanced right when coming out of the entertainment centre rather than marching off to the left.  Then we would have realised there was a McDonalds right next door.  Epic fail.  

Little Stalky Enjoys the Afternoon

It's a funny time of year at work where things really get quiet and I, as a casual, don't get many shifts.  Today I actually got sent home early.  I'm never overly thrilled about working on the weekend but at the end of the day it is good money.  But today I only did 4 of 9 hours before it was decided that it was simply too quiet and I got sent home.  I'm always torn between being happy to enjoy the rest of my Saturday afternoon and disappointed that I've lost out on earning some money.  Today I think I was happy to enjoy the afternoon.  It's been a glorious day and as I wandered home from work I couldn't help but contemplate a swim.  Instead I put on my rubber gloves and set about doing the dishes.  Yes, I'm fun and spontaneous.  Actually, as if sensing my need for fun and spontaneity, Monster Noggin phoned to see about going for an afternoon beer.  Well who am I to say no to an afternoon beer.  So after doing the dishes I finished off the afternoon at the Blue Diamond and once again had to marvel at the beautiful town in which I live.  We were sat there, Monster Noggin and I, watching the sun go down over the ocean and it was just perfect.  We enjoyed our beer, had a good natter and watched as three fully grown men played with a toy aeroplane in the park.  Actually the toy aeroplane was fairly impressive.  So, we actually watched the sun go down over the ocean whilst a toy aeroplane did acrobatics in the sky.  Beer, good company, a great location and entertainment.  Sounds like a good afternoon to me.  

Little Stalky and Co Become Audience Members

So I mentioned that me and the gang were due to be audience members as part of Australian Top Gear and I bet you’re all keen to find out what happened.   Were there any land dwelling sharks?  Did they let Monster Noggin in?  Is Australian Top Gear as good without Clarkson?  No, Yes and no.  It was a cold night (we’re having weird May winds) when the four of us headed towards Sydney to participate as audience members.  That would be Monster Noggin, Mystical Roo and I, plus a friend who at this point doesn’t have a funky alias.  We shall call him Mr Mechanic.  It sounds jovial.  We turned up at dinner time, which meant we were all hungry.  Luckily some entrepreneurial folk had realised there would be hundreds of hungry people lurking around and so had set up a burger stand.  Nice.   We handed over our tickets and had our arms stamped with the Top Gear logo; proof that we were genuine audience members and not randomers off the street.  I think this is where the land dwelling shark got thwarted.  He didn’t have a stamp.  Get back to your letter box shark boy!  Any hoo, the set was exactly how it looks on TV.  Funny that.  We filmed for several hours, though most of this – as expected – involved us standing around whilst pieces of the set got moved, cars got shifted and presenters sorted themselves out.  We clapped on cue, we laughed on cue and even gasped in “surprise” as an engine was dropped from a height.  Of course we couldn’t see it hanging from the crane…But that’s TV.  I’ve had a number of behind the scenes experiences and have no illusions about how fake the whole thing is.  I must say that the people at Top Gear were certainly the friendliest and did a good job of keeping the audience entertained whilst they got things in place.  I was an extra in King Arthur (grubby peasant 264) – yes, I can be seen on camera – and the people there were just abrupt and rude.  We went to the GMTV thing in Sydney and they only cared about people with babies.  The Top Gear people were appreciative of people giving up their time, for free, to stand around and do as they’re told.   The presenters don’t have anything on Clarkson, Hammond and May, but they’re good in their own unique Australian way.  There I go with the poetry again.  We saw some interesting cars, Monster Noggin saved a man’s life and we saw Jamie Durie – stripper turned gardener and Australia’s answer to Alan Tischmarsh – run through the masses (to much applause) and have a chat with the host.  All in all it wasn’t a bad night and I’m pleased we had the experience but I don’t think we’d do it again.  There was a lot of standing around and on a school night, it was a late finish.  Mystical Roo drove home whilst Monster Noggin and I napped in the back.  And that was our evening.  I know you’re probably thinking, who is Mr Mechanic?  And, who did Monster Noggin save?  But that’s a story for another day.

Things Get Muddy

Well we've just returned home from 24 hours at Relay for Life and we're exhausted.  And rather muddy.  But our little town has done good and we've raised over $100,000 for the Cancer Council.  Unfortunately the weather decided to put a dampener on things this year and after a brief glimpse of sunshine the heavens opened and the rain set in for a good few hours.  The result of heavy rain, grass and hundreds of people walking round and round in a circles?  A hell of a lot of mud.  I had prepared for such an eventuality and was kitted out in waterproof trousers, jacket and the all important leopard print wellies.  I was therefore able to trudge through the mud with little difficulty.  Not so easy for those in trainers and poor Mystical Roo and Monster Noggin got very cold and wet feet.  It got to the point where most people were walking around with bare feet.  It was a shame the ground got so boggy because it made walking difficult and in the end health and safety took precedence and the walking was stopped.  With the sun down and the ground showing no signs of drying it was just becoming unsafe to continue.  But even though the walking was stopped we stayed for the whole night and camped out amongst the mud.  Everyone was in high spirits and the fundraising continued despite the walk itself being stopped.  Mystical Roo and I paid $10 to enter a trivia competition and I'm pleased to confirm that we won.  We actually won!  A lot of effort went in to that and it paid off as we were rewarded with a bottle of wine and a $90 gift voucher for the Hungry Duck in Berry.  Result!  So we might have been covered in mud, cold and pretty tired but for $100,000 for Charity and $90 for us, I think it was worth it.  

Changing a Light Bulb

Amazing jar of fruit pastels.  Note:
coriander trying to get in on the
action in the background

Mystical Roo and I have had a fairly productive day today, stocking up on items for winter and ensuring the cupboards are full of food.  We actually invested in a horse today.  Not a real horse.  A fake horse.  A clothes horse to be precise.  It was a bargain at $20 but as is often the case with these kind of cheap items there was something wrong with it.  It was missing a wheel.  I was initially quite excited about it having wheels but then decided the wheels weren't that important.  And I couldn't have a wonky clothes horse.  Mystical Roos clothes pants might dry at a funny angle and that would never do.  I guess I should have taken it back and demanded my missing wheel but I didn't think it was worth the petrol.  Or the effort.  We'd only spent $20 on the thing after all.  So I decided to remove the wheels instead.  With all wheels removed it would at least stand up straight and that was the main thing.  I found a tool of some description in our drawer of doom and successfully - with no help from Mystical Roo - removed the remaining three wheels.  I was very proud of myself.  As well as our dodgy clothes horse, we also picked up some funky jars for the storage of pasta, sugar and sweets.  Namely fruit pastels.  I now have a massive jar full of fruit pastels.  It looks superb.  Less exciting items of purchase were light bulbs as both the light bulbs in the stairwell had decided to go on strike.  No one likes a dark stairwell.  Except vampires, stalkers and muggers.  Quite frankly we want to discourage their presence.  The trouble with replacing light bulbs in the stairwell is that they're rather high up.  And one can't place a chair on the staircase.  It's just not safe.  As I don't have one of those cool ladders that El Kenco has had her eye on I decided that Mystical Roo and I could team up to change the light bulbs.  So, armed with a new light bulb (an energy saver no less) I settled myself upon Mystical Roo's shoulders and then Mystical Roo stood up so that I could change the light bulb.  A scary experience.  Never have I felt so tall.  But it worked.  On the bottom light bulb at least.  The one at the top of the stairs was not so easy.  Stood on the tallest step, with Mystical Roo and me on his shoulders, we could not reach the light bulb.  Then (Bear Z should stop reading at this point) I had the the genius idea to stand on the banister to reach the light bulb.  I figured if Mystical Roo had a good hold of my waist then I would be supported and in a good position to change the light bulb.  Still on Mystical Roo's shoulders I set about positioning myself on the banister but my body simply wouldn't let me move.  It's like my brain went into sensible mode and decided that standing on the banister was not a good idea.  Finally I made it though and was totally safe because Mystical Roo had his arms around me.  I'm sure he was tempted to give me a shove but held firm.  As Mystical Roo later noted, I moved my arms and nothing else as I went about changing the light bulb, frozen with fear of toppling into the abyss.  With the vampires, stalkers and muggers.  But I successfully completed my light bulb changing task and decided that Mystical Roo and I make a good team.  Now we have light.  And lots of it.  No vampires, stalkers or muggers.  And a massive jar of fruit pastels!  

Steak, Sausages and a Colourful Beard

Mystical Roo and I have just got back from our fundraising BBQ, cold, a bit soggy, rather colourful but feeling pleased to have done something worthwhile with our evening.  The weather was promising when we left the house but true to Easter and BBQ form the heavens opened and it poured with rain.  Mystical Roo and I have yet to attend a fundraising BBQ without it raining.  I'm starting to think we're bad luck.  But I think everyone had fun and we've raised hundreds of dollars for the Cancer Council through our Relay for Life team.  Mystical Roo and I arrived at about 16.30 to prepare bread for the BBQ.  We're very experienced at this now and despite that fact that my bread counting skills are a bit iffy, I thought we did a good job.  Then Mystical Roo was on BBQ duty whist Monster Noggin and I took on the hair spraying; charging small children $2 to have their hair sprayed in various shades of colour and glitter.  Parents everywhere must have been thanking us for sending their kids back covered in hairspray.  But before we did the kids we had to do our own hair.  Advertise our handiwork and draw in the masses.  Monster Noggin had a rather fetching shade of pink sprayed through her hair and I had some purple and glitter in my pigtails.  We even managed to persuade Mystical Roo to get some colour put in his beard.  Yellow and green to be precise.  We thought it appropriate after Norwich hammered the scum - ahem - I mean Ipswich, over the weekend.  He looked cool.  And was in no way scaring small children with his yellow and green beard.  We had a lot of customers and were free to get creative with their hair.  They seemed happy and we in turn were pleased with our results despite the fact that everything was covered in glitter and colour.  It might have rained - as it always seems to do - but the atmosphere was great.  The band had the kids up and dancing, we sold out of food, we had a raffle, a guess the jaffas competition and masses of children wandering around with colourful heads.  A good night.  Now we're showered, Mystical Roo's beard is back to normal colour and the kettle is on.  Time for a cup of tea and a film!  

Little Stalky and Mystical Roo Relay for Life

This year Mystical Roo and I will be taking part in Relay for Life, where we will "relay"for 24 hours in order to raise money for the Cancer Council.  Relay for Life came to our town last year and we managed to raise something like $64,000.  We as in the town, not we as in me and Mystical Roo.  We're not that good.  So we're doing it again this year as it was great fun and also helps to raise money for a wonderful cause.  We join as part of my team from work and in the weeks before the Relay we'll be doing various fundraising activities as we (the town) try to beat last year's total.  Over Easter we'll be having a bake sale, for which I'm hoping Ammy will whip me up some of her famous cheese straws, a fundraising BBQ and raffle.  We've also got things like guess how many jaffas are in the jar.  I know some of you are wondering what the hell a jaffa is and I can tell you now that they're rather yummy orange flavoured chocolate type things.  Yes.  At last year's BBQ I was helping with the spraying of exciting colours into small children's hair.  Dangerous.  Not only because I don't really click with kids but because I was let loose with a colourful hair spray.  I know that my own hair was sprayed green.  A good look.  I ended up going for stripes and spots (which went down very well) and managed to avoid getting any kids in the eye.  Result.  On the day of the Relay we'll set up the tent and then start walking.  We, me and Mystical Roo, don't walk for 24 hours straight but we, the town, will walk for 24 hours straight.  The idea is to have at least one person from your team walking at all times.  Hence the tent.  We go in a circuit and change directions on the sound of a horn.  I assume this is to stop us from getting dizzy.  Along the way you walk past other teams' camps and can buy various fundraising items.  I got myself a corn on the cob and Mystical Roo had to empty his pockets a number of times as we passed the sweet stand over and over and over.  As well as raising money, the Relay is also used to remember those who have been lost to cancer and support those who are fighting it.  There is an overwhelming feeling of togetherness as a community comes together to try and do something positive.  Mystical Roo and I will be relaying from the 31st of April to the 1st of May.  If you'd like to donate to our team then you can follow this link:  Easties - East Beach Holiday Park : Relay For Life: Cancer Council NSW 

Mystical Roo Buys a Surfboard

Following his recent surf lesson Mystical Roo decided that he wanted to buy his own surfboard.  And he's gone and done just that.  I didn't have much input in this but know that Mystical Roo has been liaising with Band Man to ensure he buys the best board for him.  Apparently, because he's a beginner, he needs a nice long board.  When he improves he can then downsize to a shorter board.  So Mystical Roo ordered his board and his wetsuit and is now prepared to be a proper surfer.  He actually went to collect his surfboard, which was hanging out at the warehouse, last night.  He was on big brother duty last night and went to collect Monster Noggin from a night out so she didn't have to get the train with all the scary train dwellers.  Yes, there are train dwelling sharks out there.  So on his way there he picked up his new surfboard and brought it home.  I didn't think much of this as I, having to get up for work this morning, was asleep.  When I got up this morning I came and sat down in my usual spot - the desk - and then noticed the massive surfboard propped up against the wall.  Massive surfboard!  Mystical Roo informs me it's 8'2.  Good God.  It's a beast.  Though a rather nice shade of red I think.  I have to wonder where the surfboard plans to live.  I think Mystical Roo thinks it will be a good addition to the flat.  It will give it a by the beach look.  I'm less convinced but if it makes him happy....Anyway, apparently a wetsuit will be delivered  somewhen and then Mystical Roo can happily surf his way through the winter.  As I'll be working all weekend I think Mystical Roo has plans to surf the day away.  Well it will be good exercise for him.  Maybe when he gets better I might be tempted to give it a little go.  In shallow water though and on the baby waves.   With the babies.  He should be a pro in time for Bear Z and Rabby's summer visit and then they can have a go too.  I bet they're excited about that!  I know I am.      

Snuggie Wearing Stalky Gets her Write On

Amongst other things - receptionist extraordinaire, protector of plants, super snuggie wearing Stalky - I'm also a writer.  Today I've sent a sample of my book off to a publisher in the hope that someone, one day, will want to publish my work.  I've been writing stories since I was very small.  I remember writing adventures on lined paper, which I kept in a folder.  Then I moved on to a computer and started typing out my stories, reading them to El Kenco as they progressed.  This is one of the reasons why I'm now a ridiculously speedy typist and sometimes referred to as "book girl" by narrow minded folk from school who somehow still think it's cool to mock someone who has a passion for writing.  Luckily for me I don't care about those people and don't actually have to bother with them anymore as I now live half way round the world.  This is not the reason why I moved.  The thing is, I don't think I could not write.  I love to write.  I didn't decide one day that I might try to write a book, I just had a need to write a story.  It's like an overwhelming urge that just grips you and sees you sat at your computer for hours on end as you disappear into a world entirely of your making.  I still have the stories that I wrote when I was younger and I cringe when I read them but I remember how much I loved writing them.  I just hope that my current work is of a higher standard.  It's very hard putting your work out there for other people to judge.  Rejection is inevitable and I never expect quick results but every time I send my work off I hold on to a tiny sliver of hope.  That maybe someone will read my book and think it worthy of publishing.  So fingers crossed everyone!  We'll see what happens. 

Little Stalky Gets Her Paint On

Today I've been painting.  I've been let loose with a paint brush and a big tin of red paint.  Mystical Roo and Monster Noggin will be doing an expo in Melbourne shortly and I was helping out by painting the stand.  Red.  I'm actually not bad at painting and do rather a neat job.  It's just everything else that gets messed up.  Myself included.  I was looking rather stylish when I left the house this morning in pink jogging bottoms, an over sized red t-shirt borrowed from Mystical Roo and a pair of flip flops.  Then I got to wear pink gloves and use red paint.  How very colour coordinated of me.  So I spent the morning painting the stand, taking extreme care to make sure the paint was even but not noticing the paint I was dripping on the floor and onto my trousers.  Oh well.  I can't be perfect.  At least I'm not as bad as El Kenco who, when helping me to paint my house in England, managed to get gloss paint all over her face.  We're still not sure how it happened but by the end of the day there was definitely more paint on El Kenco than there was on my skirting boards.  When we were kids I must confess that I thought it would be a good idea to cover my hands in blue, gloss paint but then, I was a kid.  I think it took a lot of white spirit to get that lot off.  Not cool.  But I've done a fair bit of painting since then and have learned several valuable tips.  Always sand before you paint.  Wear latex gloves to protect your hands from paint - especially gloss!  Wrap your paintbrushes in clingfilm when you're having a tea break.  And never let El Kenco near your skirting boards! 

Fluffy Booties

Check out my fluffy booty slippers.  How cool are these?!  Don't you think everyone should own a pair?  Because I do.  I put them on today, not because it was cold - it's actually 27 about now - but because I haven't worn them in ages and felt they deserved an outing.  They're very comfy slippers and because they're booties, they don't slip off my feet.  That means I can tear around the house like a lunatic and feel confident that if I do fall over, it won't be because I've slipped out of my slippers.  It's because I'm clumsy and will have run straight into a wall or something.  As you do.  They're also warm and keep my toes nice and snug in the cold Australian winter...ok it doesn't get that cold but I have poor circulation and turn purple in the slightest breeze.  Also, fluffy booty slippers are excellent if you're of a mind to pretend you're a yeti.  Or a polar bear.  Or anything else with large, white, hairy feet.  You can really get into character stomping around in those bad boys.  So, fluffy booty slippers are safe, practical, comfortable, warm, fun and of course very stylish.  These things look good with any outfit.  Jeans, skirts, leggings, evening wear.  You can't go wrong.   Can you imagine the fluffy booty slippers teamed up with the snuggie.  Snugtastic!  Ooh if I put my earmuffs on and a little hat and some gloves, I'd be the warmest Stalky in the land.  Or I could go and sit in the sunshine, but really you've got to protect your skin.  The fluffy booty slipper, snuggie, earmuff, hat, glove combo is much more practical.  Bear Z would argue that white is never practical but I've yet to have a spillage.  And yes, I know I've just jinxed it but I'm proud of the fact that I've owned these fluffy booty slippers for over a year now and haven't wrecked them with wine, beetroot, curry or any other colourful food item.  I think the the message of today's post is clear.  Go forth everyone and buy yourself some fluffy booty slippers!     

Little Stalky Tries to Leave the Gym

I've made the decision to cancel my gym membership.  I've done what I'm sure many others have done in the past.  Joined the gym with good intentions, initially used the gym, gradually got bored of the gym, made excuses not to go to the gym and now have a gym membership that I pay for but don't really use.  This is not a good use of money.  Especially when you're on a budget!  I really enjoyed the yoga classes but, as Mystical Roo pointed out, I'd rather pay for a specific yoga class or, as Monster Noggin pointed out, buy a new yoga DVD once a month, than pay for a whole gym membership.  And there is so much exercise out there that can be done for free.  I walk to work often enough!  And what with all the adventures I have in day to day life, it's not like I don't work up a sweat once in a while.  I was spurred on by the fact that both Monster Noggin and Mystical Roo have cancelled their gym membership.  If they're not going then I'm definitely not going.  But I have a feeling that cancelling my gym membership isn't going to be as easy as I'd hoped.  I made an initial call at work a day or so ago.  Hello, I'd like to cancel my gym membership please.  The man who answered the phone was initially very polite, but as soon as I said those words - cancel my gym membership - I could sense a change in atmosphere.  Maybe I'm just being paranoid.  Maybe not.  But I've seen the Friends episode where they try to quit the gym!  No one wants you to quit the gym!  He muttered something about checking and then put me on hold.  He came back to say no, I couldn't do it over the phone, I had to come in personally to sign a form.  Sign a form?  Why do I have to sign a form to cancel my membership.  Can't I just stop coming and stop paying.  Now I'll have to face actual people who'll give me evils and ask me why I've dared to leave the gym.  The other annoying thing is that I won't be able to get up there until Monday at least.  My shifts at work don't allow me to get home in time to get to the gym (another reason for cancelling) and I don't have a car to drive myself up there in my lunch break.  So now I have to wait for my day off to trudge all the way up to the gym to cancel the stupid gym membership.  And I bet I get charged for these days in between.  These days where I can't get to the gym.  I told Monster Noggin and Mystical Roo about my plight and they informed me that all they'd done was send an email.  Send an email!  Why I can't I just send an email?  Why do I have to make a personal appearance?  All of this has put me in a thoroughly bad mood - watch out for rain clouds!  At least, when I finally do get up to the gym to cancel the stupid gym membership, I'll be in the frame of mind not to get walked over by anyone.  I will be cancelling my gym membership and if you try to argue with me there'll be hell to pay.  We'll see how it goes.  

The Flood



Floods at the Holiday Park



Well, after the declogging of the drain yesterday I then went to work and had the most surreal day ever.  We had six weeks worth of rain in one day and as a result there was horrendous flooding throughout the area.  One of the scariest things was how quickly the water came up.  One minute we were commenting on how heavy it was raining, the next the sinks exploding with water, tents are being washed away and caravans are coming hurtling up the road to escape the torrents.  It was shocking and very unnerving.  I've never seen anything like it.  It came up so fast that we didn't have time to get cars out, we didn't have time to warn anyone.  It just happened.  Then there were caravans rolling backwards down the hill and just chaos.  I managed to get through to Mystical Roo who had been trapped at the warehouse with Ammy and Treacle.  The water was too deep to get the cars in and the three of them had to wade out to safety.  Mystical Roo lost his flip flops!  They all got to safety but couldn't get home for several hours as the roads were flooded and blocked.  I got home just after lunch but many of the roads back from work were flooded.  I ran back to the flat to check the balcony; images of water rushing through into the lounge nagging at my brain.  Luckily the water hadn't come through but was mere millimeters away.  I cleared the drain and was told by work to stay home.  I went and sat with Grandma until the others returned.  It was a relief to know they were all safe but all we wanted was for them to walk through the door.  The thing is, this flood was nothing compared to what happened in Queensland.  It's hard to imagine the horror they experienced.  The flood water has now receded but I think we were all left a little shaken.  That's the first time I've experienced anything like it and there's danger everywhere.  I'm just thankful that we're all safe and relatively little damage has been done.   

Little Stalky: Queen of the Clouds

After recently confirming that I can predict a storm with my headaches I've now started to wonder if I can actually influence the weather with my moods.  Could this actually be possible?  Does Little Stalky really have this kind of power?  Well, lets look at the facts.  Roughly three weeks ago I was super excited that El Kenco would be making her first visit to Australia.  On the day of her arrival the skies were blue, the sun was shining, the birds were singing and the land dwelling sharks were getting their groove on.  I'm not saying I can influence the animals but I guess the weather can in turn influence them.  They were happy.  I was happy.  We were all happy.  Then, three weeks on, the inevitable happens and El Kenco has to return back to England.  Much sadness.  Little Stalky is not happy.  El Kenco is not happy.  So since the day we drove El Kenco to the airport it's been grey and raining.  Grey and raining!  The weather has been as dark as my mood.  I went to bed last night feeling rather low as I was missing El Kenco and also battling with the other inevitable event: heading back to work.  Double whammy.  And all night it absolutely poured with rain.  It was hammering down and was so loud that it woke me up a number of times.  Then I couldn't get back to sleep as I was imagining the balcony flooding again - even though it had been ok all day - and my babies drifting away in an over sized puddle!  Stressful.  This morning I'm trying to get back into routine, setting my alarm, making my sandwiches, but I think it's going to be a long day ahead.  And so the clouds are churning outside, looking dark and menacing, threatening another downpour.  So it seems to me that I do have influence over the weather.  And if this is in fact the case, then I need to cheer up before people start lynching me over the rain.

New Additions to the Garden



Was going to post a photo of the pot with the
lemon tree but due to rain, we've been rained
off.  Bloody rain.

 I was very spoilt on my recent birthday and was showered with the most lovely gifts.  Amongst my lovely gifts were new additions for the balcony.  Oh the excitement of it all.  So the latest newcomers joining Little Stalky's family of plants are...Mint, Basil and Oregano.  Yay!  Imagine much squealing and bouncing and then more squealing and you get a rough idea of the excitement.  Not only that but Monster Noggin bought me the amazing plant pot that I've been eyeing up for the past few months.  It's so beautiful.  It reminds me of an old fashioned barrel, chopped in half.  The lemon tree is going to be rehoused in the new pot.  Man that lemon tree will look so stylish.  Then, with my experience of mint being that it grows rather enthusiastically, the mint will be potted in the lemon tree's previous house.  Then I run out of pots.  Mystical Roo has kindly brought me home two buckets from work, which I will use for the potting of the basil and the oregano.  I think I'm going to need two more pots on top of that though as the strawberry's feeler now has two separate plants growing on it, both of which have put out roots.  My God, it's all go on the balcony at the moment.  I'm not sure I can keep up!