Wild Camels

Did you know that there are actual wild camels living in Australia.  When someone told me this I thought they were pulling my leg as I have a reputation for being easily fooled.  When I saw a story about them on the news then I thought it must be true.  The news doesn't lie.  It certainly wasn't out to fool me.  So, wild camels are just wandering around Australia.  Admittedly they're not exactly ambling down the streets of Sydney but there are packs of them (packs?  herds?) chilling out in the outback.  How cool is that!  Apparently not very cool.  Apparently they're a bit of a menace.  How can camels be menacing?  Are they going around in gangs or something.  Gangs of camels.  I like it.  But it just seemed strange to me because I'd never really associated camels with Australia.  I always pictured them out in the Middle East.  But apparently Australia is the only country in the world that has one humped camels that are wild.  This is what I'm told.  Or this is what I heard.  Woo freedom for camels!  

It's That Time of Year Again...

Oh yes, Spring is nearly here and I couldn't be happier.  I might still need the Snuggie whilst I'm in the house but as soon as you step into the sun it's full on shorts and t-shirt weather.  I even managed to catch the sun over the weekend and now have strap marks to prove it.  The heating hasn't been on in weeks and the need for big fluffy socks is rare.  Other things that indicate Spring has sprung is the reappearance of Will the pigeon who, wimp that he is, can't handle a bit of cold weather.  Yeah, that's right pigeon.  I mocked you!  Anyway, there is also the usual fly activity and pretty soon I expect a cockroach or two to come scuttling out of the woodwork.  Goodness I make Spring sound nice!  But the trees are starting to bloom, the birds are starting to sing and Little Stalky is getting hugely excited about planting new plants!

Café Warfare

It's getting to that time of year when the weather is nice enough to sit outside and enjoy a coffee.  Or in my case, a milkshake.  There are a number of cafés in our little town, all with outdoor seating, but there is one that remains the popular favourite.  The café of cafés.  The place where we all like to go.  But there is obviously limited seating and with no one wanting to sit inside, a silent battle for seats begins.  If you arrive at the café and there's a spare seat then you have to grab it because this is a rarity, an extreme rarity.  More often than not we'll arrive and all of the seats will be taken.  Thus begins an intense examination of the folk who are already sat down.  Who is nearly finished.  Who is likely to be on the move.  Who's staying for a top up of coffee.  You have to learn to read the signs.  The grabbing of a handbag might be a move to leave or it might just be a move to retrieve a mobile phone.  A coat snatched up might be a cue but then the person might just be cold.  What's the weather doing?  Is it really that cold?  Is that old lady really chilly or is she actually getting up to leave.  There's so much to consider!  And then of course you have to keep an eye on the other vultures scouting for a table.  You might think you've got your table snaffled but then some sneaky woman and her dog will shoot in from the side and get in there before you had chance to blink.  Sneaky.  Consider too, the scouts on the other side of the road.  They might be keeping their distance and observing the situation from afar but they're speedy.  Those buggers will stop traffic just to whip in and steal your table.  You've got to stay alert.  Be on guard.  Don't let anyone distract you!  It's survival of the fittest in café warfare and weakness is simply not an option.  There's coffee and milkshakes on the line!  Of course you could always get drinks to take away and go and sit in the park but where's the fun in that.  

Will Mobilises the Troops

So we've not heard from Will the pigeon in a while now.  I think that pigeon's gone soft and naffed off during the winter months.  Now that Spring is knocking at our door, Will has returned.  And he's brought his buddies. Now, I haven't been aware of much pigeon activity and I haven't seen Will in a long time but today, in the park, there was unarguable pigeon activity.  And it was aimed at the head of our Australian buddy.  Innocently sat in the park, Monster Noggin made note that she'd seen a low flying pigeon.  I too had noticed the low flying pigeon.  Cruising just inches off the ground.  Cruising.  Spying.  Scouting.  This was the advance party, checking out the enemy, preparing for an attack.  A second low flying pigeon was quick to follow.  I eyed these pigeons with suspicion, as often I do, for in all likelihood they're part of Will's crew.  I think I was proved right when a third pigeon launched its attack.  Upon deciding that chips were in order, we stood and gathered our things.  We started to walk in the direction of the harbour.  It was then that a low flying pigeon became an attack pigeon and launched itself in our direction.  Actually it aimed itself in the direction of our Australian buddy's head!  It missed her by mere inches.  Inches!  It literally flew right through us, sending us scattering and commenting on the audacity of the pigeon.  It drew the attention of many a park goer.  But did the pigeon really miss or was it just a warning?  A warning from Will the pigeon that he's been watching us and mobilising the troops.  It was a close call.  This time it was just a close call but next time it could be a pigeon in the face.