The Wink Etiquette

After recently pondering the wave etiquette I would now like to discuss the wink etiquette, which until recently I hadn't considered.  That was until a wink incident occurred in Woolworths.  Or a wink faux pas.  All of this in my favourite place to have adventures.  Hmm.  Was I the recipient of a rogue wink gone wrong?  No I was not.  I was in fact the winker!  It was a wet Sunday afternoon and Mystical Roo and I had gone to do the grocery shopping.  I was loitering by the trolley, whilst Mystical Roo browsed the shelves and I took it upon myself to send Mystical Roo a wink.  Why not.  I was feeling in a cheeky mood. So I looked across the aisle, locked eyes with Mystical Roo and gave him the wink.  A wink and a smile in fact.  He's a lucky man.  Now the trouble with this wink was the fact that it got intercepted by another man.  An unknown man who also happened to be in the aisle, with his trolley, doing his shopping.  So the unknown man intercepted my wink and looked up to give me a winning smile.  Oops.  I hung my head in shame and couldn't help but giggle when Mystical Roo returned and I confessed that I had inadvertently winked at a random man.  Actually I hadn't winked at a random man.  I'd winked at Mystical Roo but the random man had assumed I was winking at him.  Oh how the tables had turned!  No longer was I the person embarrassed because I thought someone was waving at me who wasn't.  I'm now the person who winked at someone and got a response not from the person I'd intended the wink for.  I'm the winker.  Mystical Roo is the dude who is standing behind you and should be stood to the side.  The side dude!  So when considering my wave etiquette and the shame felt when receiving a wave not intended for my appreciation I had not considered how the waver would feel.  As the winker, who could also be a waver, I was somewhat embarrassed.  Embarrassed that I'd winked at a stranger.  Embarrassed for the stranger that thought I'd winked at him.  It's just winking waving madness.  So what is the wink / wave etiquette when you're the one handing out rogue winks and waves?  Loudly announce that the stray wink or wave was not intended for the stranger responding to you?  That's surely cruel.  Wink or wave again to save them their embarrassment?  No.  You don't want to encourage them.  You don't want to engage in conversation lest your deed be revealed in all it's random glory.  So, stop waving.  Stop winking.  For the love of God don't turn your wink into a twitch to try and mask your winking.  Just carry on as normal.  Return to your activity and remain calm.  Don't giggle!  It's just cruel.  And if you must giggle, a la Stalky, then bugger off to the next aisle.  And if you bump into your stranger whilst going for milk, a la Stalky, then go and get something else instead.  Like grapes.  Everyone loves grapes.