Demonic Soda Water

After sampling the delights of a lime and soda water drink I told Mystical Roo that I wanted to stock up so that I could have this tipple at home.  Got to love a bit of fizz and this makes me feel more grown up than having squash.  A simple drink to make - just a splash of lime cordial, ice cubes, topped up with soda water.  Simple.  Or so you would think.  But NOT when you've got demonic soda water of doom.  No.  Then it's not so simple.  We've been under attack from the demonic soda water of doom for a while now and no one seems to be able to tame the beast.  When the first explosion of fizz soaked poor Monster Noggin we thought it had just been because the bottle had been rolling around in the car.  But what about the second time?  Highly suspicious.  And then, Mystical Roo got a soaking and we all know that things like that never happen to Mystical Roo.  Then I got a soaking.  And yes, things like this happen to me all the time and perhaps should be discounted but this was like the fourth bottle in a row that had decided to explode in the kitchen.  We weren't even buying the same brands!  When I next bought a bottle of soda water I felt prepared for the battle I knew was ahead.  I'd seen the beast at work and knew it couldn't be trusted.  So my intention was to gently unscrew the lid, softly, softly, slowly, slowly, let the gas out (of the bottle - not me) bit by bit.  But this proved to be easier said than done.  Just the tiniest of twists would send the soda water into a frenzy.  It was bubbling away like soda water possessed!  There was no stopping the torrent that would ensue.  So I accepted my soaking and just went for it.  Sure enough soda water came shooting out from all angles.  I'm pretty sure some even hit the ceiling.  Perhaps I was wrong to take the softly, softly approach.  Maybe I angered the soda water and whipped it up into a rage.  So that battle was lost but the war continues and I refuse to back down.  I will have my soda water.  Maybe I'll try a sneak attack.  Wandering innocently into the kitchen, perhaps even whistling a jaunty tune, open the fridge with a yawn, reach for the milk, yes the milk, reach for the milk and then HA HA! snatch that soda water out of there so quick that it doesn't have time to react.  Unscrew the lid and pour!  Mwah ha ha haaaaa.  A cunning plan that could no doubt prove effective if only I could unscrew bottle caps without having to call for the assistance of Mystical Roo.  In which case we might have to team up, take on the demonic soda water together and fight the injustice.  Or maybe we'll just have to start wearing waterproofs in the kitchen.